February Sucked.
Sometimes in life, we are on the mountain tops, looking out over the beautiful view, loving life. No care in the world, unless you are afraid of heights. But other times in life, we find ourselves in the very, um, fertile valleys. Darkness and shadows all around. We have to climb out of the valleys to get to the mountain top, and that’s not easy work. But when life has thrown a Himalayan-sized climb at you AND you’ve made it to the top, the other valleys don’t seem quite so bad. But the mountain tops, no matter how high, are always breathtakingly beautiful.
Enter February 2023. My Himalayan mountain climb was out of Sean’s brain infection throughout his healing in 2021. I have seen the strength I’m capable of. I know what I have to give and what I need to do to care for myself in the climb. I know that I CAN make the climb from any valley life throws at me. And I’m glad I have that and my faith, or this past month would have broken me completely.
Sean shared that he felt his mental health was declining, like his infection was coming back. That alone was enough to “Tonya Harding” my knee caps for anyone who gets that reference. (Yes, I’m old.) I took the necessary steps and talked to one of his two doctors and came up with a plan. I’m still waiting for the second to call me back a month later. Plan in action, I relaxed a bit.
Then Sean had a rough night. No need to discuss all of the details, but it definitely had me on edge for a while. With that crisis averted, I was waiting for him to get home when I got The Phone Call. The phone call no parent ever wants to get. I answer. It didn’t sound like the phone was near his face, I couldn’t make out exactly what he was saying, what was going on. Then I hear him drop the f-bomb, multiple times. He tells me he was in an accident. The time it took us to make it to him seemed like an eternity. He was fine, just shaken. The car, however, ended up being totaled. He hit a slick patch on the road in the fog and misjudged the bend in the road. He hit the curb and it swung him around 180 deg. Jacked up the suspension and bent the rear axle. Not a scratch on the body of the car. No whiplash, aches, or pains ever.
That’s enough to experience in the course of one week. This body is still healing from the trauma three years ago! But wait, there’s more (read that in your best “As Seen On TV” voice).
Four days later, Ty wants to do a long bike ride. This kid loves his road bike and loves biking. He has plans to do races and takes his training seriously. He plans and prepares. So when he was about to leave for his 70 mile bike ride on Sunday, I was nervous, but we went through all of the safety details to make my heart happy. I met him half way through his ride to bring more water to him while he stopped for a bit to eat. As I watched him ride off with cars zooming by him, I wanted to go throw him in the car and take him home. But I need to let them stretch their wings, right? I went home and laid down on the couch because this mama was TIRED from the week and needed a nap. Then I get The Text. “I fell.” “Pick me up.” “I have some nice people around.” I sprang off of the couch so fast and put my shoes on. He wasn’t responding to my texts. And of course, the “Find My” app decided it wanted to take it’s time to find Ty’s location. (Anyone else have this problem with this app? It seems that whomever in my family I want to see, it suddenly can’t find that one person. Ugh.) When I called his cell, a woman answered. Not good. He ended up being the first in our family to get to ride in an ambulance and we had the pleasure of visiting the new Penn State Health hospital in Landisville. A nap was not had that day.
This is a lot. I feel that if this storyline was pitched to a tv show, it’d get scrapped for not being believable. It took everything out of me. I was exhausted. But where our thoughts go, so we go. I could dwell on the horrible things that happened, or I can dwell on the good things that happened. There are always good things.
While Sean was waiting for us to arrive, another kid in the indoor percussion group was on his way home with his dad. They pulled over and waited with him and stayed with us for a while. Their lives were disrupted that night, but we are forever grateful.
The tow truck driver (Brian and Wayne’s Towing) was so kind and so knowledgeable. He reassured Sean that these things happened. He got that car on the flatbed masterfully, limiting the amount of damage that was already done.
No one else was involved in that crash.
Sean walked away without a scratch. No aches, no pains. Not even the next day.
The attachment to the Prius was strong, but he is thoroughly enjoying driving stick now.
The first person to stop with Ty was certified CPR and first aid. He immediately started to render aid to Ty.
The second person to stop was a registered nurse. She checked Ty for injuries and a concussion and stabilized him while the kind man called 911.
The third person to stop was an off-duty cop, Officer Cruz, who was on his way to his shift. He took command of the scene, got our information for the ambulance crew, and locked Ty’s bike up in the department’s garage.
Several other people stopped to help. One person gave up their coat to cover Ty until the ambulance arrived. Another was rubbing his hands to keep them warm.
Ty fell in New Holland in the middle of nowhere. He was on a back road. He could have been lying there for a while until someone found him.
The ER was empty when we got there. We arrived in a lull in the night. It definitely got busier while we were there.
I wish I could say it was the best possible break he could get, but it’s not. We find out next week if he’ll need surgery. But a lot of people have been praying and it is healing quickly, so we are hopeful.
In the midst of all of this, God met me where I was and showed me little gifts to let me know he’s with me through this whole thing.
Now, let’s end on a laugh. It’s a choice I made and I’m fine with that. Sean feels very differently and for me it’s a battle not worth fighting. He is usually very respectful here at home, in the immediate aftermath of his accident, he was letting it all out. It’s hard to calm someone down on the phone after they’ve been in an accident, but I was trying, ok? As he was telling me that the car had spun through the intersection, I said something along the lines of, “That must have been terrifying.” Sean’s response: “Of course it’s f-ing terrifying. What the sh-t, mom.” I abbreviated in typing. He did not in speaking. The next day, as we were replaying the situation, I found out he didn’t really remember a lot of what he said that night, so I told him this bit and we all had a laugh about it. Fast forward to Sunday night on the way home from the ER with Ty. He was moving so gingerly and I made a comment about the pain. Ty’s response: “Of course it’s f-ing painful. What the sh-t, mom.” We all just started laughing. Apparently this is our thing now.
Bad things will happen in our lives. There is no escaping it. But in those situations, always look for the good. Focus on the good if you can. It makes surviving this time so much more bearable.
